Question for the day...

NATO Bombs Plucky Libyan Rebels!

                                         

NATO Typhoon and Rafael Fighter/Bombers 

                  (Factory Complete with Everything But a Clue)

Early Reports are Rebels firing into the air at a military funeral were reported as anti-aircraft fire and drew a counterattack from "NATO-led" aircraft.

Given the fact that Arabs firing wildly into the air is a completely unheard of phenomenon, this is perfectly natural mistake to have made.  At this time it is unknown which nation's planes actually made the attack, but given that by now any US pilots flying there have probably had previous time in the sandbox, I'm guessing it was Eurotrash or green NATO commanders overriding the pilots' common sense.

Marine Aviator Confused About Libya...

"Okay, can somebody explain to me WHY there's

a picture of Charles DeGaulle on the bulkhead in

the ready room?"

"And what's with all the F***ing cheese and

molluscs in the wardroom?""

"And while we're at it, as long as I'm flying CAS for

AL F***ING QAEDA, which side of the nose do

I paint the little bombs and crescents on?"

And Rob Belvedere discovers Obama getting his inner gyrene on...

So Obama spoke last night...

I maced myself as I crossed the picket line.  Screw me, I want to talk about this.

So Obama gave a 7-page, single-spaced speech last night about Libya.

And what do we know now that we didn't know last night?

Who are we fighting to protect?  Are the rebels a pack of AQ throw-offs who've been exporting trained terrorists throughout Europe and the Middle East, or are they a plucky band of Benghazi U humanities majors and their spirited public employee union allies acting out a "Red Dune" scenario.

Dunno.  Obama didn't tell us.

Told us it was not in our national interest for Libya to have a civil war.  Why?

Dunno.  Obama didn't tell us.

Told us NATO was" taking command of the enforcement of the arms embargo and the no-fly zone. Last night, NATO decided to take on the additional responsibility of protecting Libyan civilians."

Um, except this morning they're not, not yet, anyway.

Said the United States " has done what we said we would do."

Except we haven't.  Ghaddafi is still in power and we have said regime change is not our objective.  SO WHO THE FUCK ARE WE BLOWING UP?!

Dunno.  Obama didn't tell us.

"Moreover, America has an important strategic interest in preventing Qaddafi from overrunning those who oppose him. A massacre would have driven thousands of additional refugees across Libya’s borders, putting enormous strains on the peaceful –- yet fragile -– transitions in Egypt and Tunisia."

Except that the refugees are swamping Italy instead, realizing there are no government dole checks in Egypt and Tunisia.

"There will be times, though, when our safety is not directly threatened, but our interests and our values are."  Liiiike....?  Apparently like those American values that are defended by flying airstrikes in support of Al Qaeda.  Those values.

"The United States will not be able to dictate the pace and scope of this change."

Our commander in chief appears unclear about how bombers and aircraft carriers work.  One airstrike on Ghaddafi's palace on day one of the insurrection and the tempo would have changed a LOT.

"But let us also remember that for generations, we have done the hard work of protecting our own people, as well as millions around the globe. We have done so because we know that our own future is safer, our own future is brighter, if more of mankind can live with the bright light of freedom and dignity."

President Bush, is that you?

To sum up: we weren't told why we went in or how long we're going to be there.  We WERE told we don't intend to enforce "regime change" on the monster who supposedly made it imperative we go in.  We are defending American values by flying air cover for terrorists and we are defending our national interests by putting our troops in harms' way under the orders of foreign powers who can't even permit themselves to admit they are in charge of the mission they called for.  We are flying 95% of the combat missions in this "joint action" and we are going to stay there as long as Sarkozy wants us to.

Did I miss anything?

NATO appoints Libyan Operations Commander - a Canadian

Following the appointment of Canadian Forces Lt. General Charles Bouchard to command the Libyan no-fly zone and other noncombat operations, NATO Europe has elected to appoint a special subordinate officer directly under him to make sure the Continental perspective is considered in all command decisions.

Of particular concern to the European NATO partners is Bouchard's long association with US forces.  The ultimate sticking point for NATO Europe is the award to Lt. General Bouchard of the US Legion of Merit, a decoration traditionally awarded in American service to any senior officer who completes a foreign deployment without contracting an STD.

Europeans are constitutionally incapable of trusting anyone lacking a social disease, so this is a significant concern for them.

NATO Europe has therefore assigned Belgian Bridgadier Maurice "Au Secours" Sproutes-Brusselles(shown, far right) to work beneath Bouchard.

Sproutes-Brusselles, late of the 3.me Chassées Belges ("The Whippets") has the sort of military record any European force can respect.  Since his days as a cadet in his youth he has been overrun by some of the most distinguished military formations on the Continent.  He has served Belgium as expected in numerous overseas deployments, and was decorated for his gallant retreat along with several subordinates from Stanleyville in the Belgian Congo during that country's war for independence, an engagement referred to by Congolese veterans of the struggle as "Le Barbecue Blanche".

Sproutes-Brusselles will be tasked by NATO to coordinate directly with the Arab League's representative for strategy and planning, Mohammed Hussein Akhbar al-Tikriti, regarded in the Middle East as a distinguished Western scholar who has read every book Michael Moore has ever written.  His thesis, "The Effect of Sustained Application of Machetes on Third World Social Stability" is still required reading at St. Cyr.

When asked to comment on the appointment, the US Commander of the Sixth Fleet, tasked with continuing actual combat operations against Libya under NATO command, went on the record as stating:

"This will get out of control... this will get out of control and we

will be lucky to live through it!"

Mickey "Scraps" Mikowski
CSM 2nd Michigan Citizens' Militia (Ret.)
is Three Beers Later's Special Guest
Military Affairs Correspondent